One-two, one-two, I finally figured it out!

Fer da past three years, I've been tryin da soap dish in my locker dere to plorg my comporter box inta.  Even though I've got the faggiest idear how I gots da wall ourtlet conforsticated with da soap dish dere, I finally rorlized what I was dorin wrong!  Sowrry bout da long orbsense, dere, Ramrod.  But I'm porstin again!  Dese interwebs tries to phase me - but I handles it!

All you ladies from the other corntry dere post your phone numbers for da Coach Z!  I gosta make up fer all da lost time dat I've missed!

well hey, dere!

I see dat it's been quite da time since I was last orn here porstin some xanga thingies.  I aporlagize for my absence, but ya know, I'm runnin on 56k over here and ah, well, I sortsta forgat to pay my phorn bill a corple months ago, so I've been kinda out of the loop, dere, so to speak.  But I did a couple favors for Strong Bad and he paid me real good for it, dere!  I'd never seen da guy so generous in my whorle life!  I wonder why getting Marzipan out of her house dere for five hours was sorch a big deel to him.  I mean, when I left, he and da chort and Strong Mad were all standin outside Marzy's house wit spray paint and bats and vegetarble oils.  I wonder whats they were doin?

But, to make da longer story da shorter one, I'm 100 percent back on da line!  I think I'll write a song about it, dere.

Hey sorry I harven't posted in a while, dere.  I've been workin with Homegrown on his defenserve game on da off season, and he's been havin some trouble woarkin off all a' dose Cold Ones dat he's been drinkin dere lately.  I think he's been haangin out over at uh, dat Marzypan's house da past corple of days, and I'm just afeared dat he's been fogettin about da torneyment dat he's got cormin up next week.  Da big game of da big sport!  No time for a woman in a life committed to glory!  When I lived orp in da other country, I had women all over me!  I mean, when about twornty of den came up and wouldn't stap touchin me, I just had to tell dem dat I was committed to my rappin business.  I wars a big heartbreaker up dere.  I even wrote a sorng about it!  It was da top biggest hit for sumthin like, uh four yors!  And den even more women wanted me!!  I had more den two prablems.  But dat's all over now.  I'm happy where I am now- Free Country is wornderful!

but I need ta go and help Ramrod run some suicide sprity-things.  Lata, homies!

Hey dere, this is Coach Zee!  Oh, well I guess y'already know that cuz yerr here at dis site and, you're lookin at da pictures of me, I should think.  Ahm, I was kinda wond'rin what ta do here, but it looks like I'm gettin it figured out now, so, I'm okay.